Monday, June 22, 2009

Daddy Day

Daddy day..., I hear the little tike's screaming from their innocent tongues
That was me year's prior to what my reality is right now
A day in the life of a Daddy's Little Girl
The love for him made me come alive
He was the reason for my strong 
Girlie like ways
I was Lil' LC(Leon 
The strength instilled in me being raised by such a stern ass Dad transformed me into who I am today
As tough as nails they would call the 3 beauties of Quincy street
Me being the youngest one with Italian blood mixed about with the Jamerican culture
I was unbeatable
Whether you be a girlie or a boy you couldn't stand a chance against my right hook
Tomboy..,, some may say but my dress and sandals were ready for any street battle that came my way
I took my strength and went all the way thru my teen years until the word "LoVE" was "introduced"
A feeling I couldn't get 
Mike Tyson's help to fight
Something that swallowed me whole and spit me out to what was now a new world
Daddy never discussed this 
kind of love, so I never knew what to expect
Him and Mom went their separate ways and all families I grew up around was just as broken as mine
1 parent in one house the other a block away
This was the life I was given to live
Broken homes were a Bedstuy's dream
No one explained to me that this would affect me eternally
Not dealing with relationships just always running into them and from them was how I was suppose to survive this life
Love being the band-aid word I would hear always
No matter what occurs, "I love you" 
But I wasn't prepared for my own batch of love
Love bit me @ the age of 16
But it didn't really hurt @ 1st
Years blew by of somewhat loves and nibbles of all types of loves and love grew in me like a fetus
The harder I loved, the worse off I would become
But the word would always just resurface as a word, once I allowed the hurt to pass
A Hoakie Pookie game of a journey
It wasn't until my 29Th year, love decided to chump down on my right arm and rip it out the socket
That's when love, injured me
I really knew that Love could hurt
Shit..,, love could kill
So I surrendered to love in the pursuit to heal
Thinking that my hard love tactics would change the word into a two person's eternal reality
I felt I had arrived @ what was known as "this is it"
But that's not the case
And today I called out to my Daddy on my 29Th year Daddy Day (for some 
family love) and no answer went thru
A msg left and no call back made
Same goes for the love I placed my wholesome self in the hands of
And my Grandpa, just the same
3 top 
men in my life have shut me out in some form
All the strength that I held onto has been ripped from me
God the love of this all, the watcher of this all, must hover me right now
I need you all thru me, holy ghost feel
For I feel like I keep driving into a brick wall knowing that I need to make a right or a left before I approach the dead-in
Crawling out of the car of love, hurt from another crash
My bestest friend's Dad shows up @ last
There's hope
God sent me some laughs
Just wanting this Daddy Day to pass


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