Monday, June 15, 2009

Christmas Blues

1st eye opens and a tear drops
Awaken from a empty feeling of something or someone missing 
The feeling coming from the depths of my winter shaped belly
Or maybe the emptiness is reporting live from my heart
As I reach for my berry, I see the red light blinking away...
8:35 in the AM and people are already up in their holiday pajamas opening away
I, Instead will lay here and just rest for 2day
My Mom isn't here...
Thanksgiving both parents absent from the most important meal of my life
Now Christmas morning without the much needed love I yearn for
I didn't need or want a gift
I just required the surroundings of my closest kins
Seeing my 5year old neice happy and excited is enough for me
But Momma won't be present as the best gift ever
Another can't drive in this weather (excuse) 
And knowing that no other route is possible because she's so set in her unconsciously hurtful ways
I tear drop, after tear drop, after tear drop
Hurt-hearted from my broken family
Eventhough, I do thank my God for giving me the bestest of friends 
I declared, so have soooo many. This day is a celebration for family
When Jesus was given to our world 
God presented him as a gift, to us all
But it was his Mom who held him 1st
Hugged him 1st
Loved him 1st
Kissed him 1st
Cherished him 1st
I tear for the absence of my Mom 
I lack thereof
Well I pray all of you enjoy ur Christmas Day
May the Merryness run thru ur veins
I'm going to try and center myself and accept what's been casted upon me on this joyous day
My gift to you is the longevity of my genuine love and true friendship
I pray my frown becomes a smile from the longing of 2day
But for now, I'm gonna try and nurse my heartache away

Merry Christmas All


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